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Friday, July 13, 2012

Match.com = Communists!



I know, I know...


This actually isn’t that good of a story, but everyone laughs at the punch line so I have to share it.

I went on Match.com. It went okay. I was tweaking my profile when I got the bright idea to write that I was open to writing to military guys stationed overseas and that I supported the troops.

Reader’s Note: My father was in the military before he died. And he was an American.

I think I even included that part. It was a fairly benign statement, like, I like being happy or I like eating ice cream when it’s hot, or I like when people are proud enough of their country to fight for it… blah, blah, blah...

And the next thing I know, Match.com kicked me off the site and refunded my money. Like, in less than 6 hours they did this. I sent an email asking why and they said that they would not tell me without a court order in the State of Tennessee. I’m not fucking joking. I have no idea what the State of Tennessee has to do with this, other than it is awesome.

This confused me for the longest time. I thought they had discovered this blog. Which is fine, because you can not separate me from my constitutional right of free expression. But then it dawned on my (Indonesian-American) friend; they thought I was looking for a green card. As if a Canadian looking to have a baby would ever move to the US – land of no universal healthcare. Get serious. Most Americans move UP HERE when they get a Canuck girlfriend. I can name five guys that I know personally that did this. Puh-leeze.

So here’s the punch line: When they refunded my money, I lost out on the exchange rate. I had purchased my subscription when the CDN was above par and when I got kicked off, my value was slightly less. So Match.com denied my right to life, liberty, marriage, babies and a fair exchange rate.

Match.com = Communists!

3 comments:

  1. HAhahaha, wow. I'm adding this to the list of reasons I won't ever touch Match again with a 10 foot pole.

    ReplyDelete
  2. My comment doesn't pertain to this post, per se, but rather is where I have landed at the end of reading your blog from the beginning. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it thus far, and find your writing style to be engaging but not distracting. You have a clear and confident "voice," and it is a compelling one.

    My urge to comment is not limited to wishing to compliment your skills, however. For whatever narcissistic reason, I also feel the need to tell you how intriguing I found your blog to be. Your approach to dating and marriage/relationships is vastly different from my own. I was engrossed for days reading about how you see your romantic prospects and goals. I have the utmost respect for what you have shared--and at the same time, it was like stepping through the looking glass into a foreign world-view. There were certain familiar elements, such as a direct style of communication some might call blunt and an insistence on clarity of personal aims and boundaries, but it was nonetheless distinctly an experience of "other." It is a rare privilege to feel you have had the opportunity to get even a true glimpse from another perspective, and so I sincerely thank you for your writing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cool! Do you really live in Vatican City? And, do you know how I get a literary agent?

      Delete

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