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Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Ladies and Gentlemen, I Submit To You ... The Funzo




I have invented a new unit of measurement and I call it the Funzo.
It measures how much Fun you are having.

Gone are the days when you ask “Was it fun?” and are met with the inaccurate and unconvincing answer of “Yes, it was a LOT of fun!”.
“A lot” has never been specific enough for me. 
I am a Scientist of the Experience and I require clean data.

Funzos are measured out of a possible 10.
They refute hyperbole.
It is both statistically inaccurate and deeply deceptive to announce that you have had 11 Funzos at a specific event. You are a wanton liar and a braggart.

Funzos can also run into the negative, but again, only to -10.
As a general PSA, please avoid negative Funzo experiences.
Also, watch for experiences that run from the low Funzos into the negative.
When this happens, it is time to leave.
I say this because I love you.

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